Showing posts with label Halloween. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Halloween. Show all posts

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

NaBloPoMo Day 4: What Will Suck

What will suck is in two weeks, when all that's left of Max's Halloween candy is Bazooka and the "?" - flavored DumDums, and I'll get all excited because I'll see a Snickers wrapper in the bottom of the bag and dig through only to realize that the Snickers wrapper is actually empty, and I ate the Snickers on Halloween night.

Then I'll get mad and throw the whole bag in the trash.

Then two hours later, I'll go get the bag from the trash, dig through it again, and eat the DumDums.

The holiday between Halloween and Thanksgiving isn't called "Veteran's Day." It's called "A Season of Regret."

P.S. Please go vote. Even if the lines are long. Even if it's raining. I'll loan you my umbrella. Please go vote.

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

While in the Stirrups...

Kimberly had a thought this morning: they should combine going to the gynocologist with a visit to the aesthetician. That way, since you're already humiliated and naked from the waist down, that might be a good time to go ahead, put your feet in the air, and get that nicely finished product you've been considering.

I feel quite certain gynocologists and bikini waxers will both have a problem with this plan, but I think it's a great idea. And, as Kimberly has said, now that gynocologists are performing plastic surgery, even in the nether regions, that line is blurring a little.

Personally, I like to scream in agony in the privacy of my own home, but that's me. Also, were I to get plastic surgery, I would not waste it on an area of such visual inaccessability.

Happy Halloween, designers. Carry on.